At long last....peace

Hi everyone, this is Edward. Seven years ago Elinor promised her dying mother that she would take care of her Dad until the day he joined her in heaven. Last night that promise was completed. Saturday morning Elinor got a call from the nursing home from the Hospice nurse telling her to come right away because her dad would be dying soon. She grabbed the kids and was there by his side within fifteen minutes. I was able to leave work early and join them and we sat by his side, watching and waiting. He appeared comfortable but was unable to respond to anything, except for an occasional lifting of one eyebrow or the squeezing of Elinor's hand in his. After many exhausting hours, I went home with Sweet Pea.

Around 9pm Elinor called and said that the nurse supervisor told her that her dad's breathing didn't indicate that he'd be going soon, so she came home with Lionel to get a little rest, all the while feeling uneasy about it. She planned to go back at 2am with Lionel to sit with him again. At 11:30pm the nursing home called to say he had died. Elinor was in a terrible state, both overcome with grief and anger because she wasn't there at the moment he passed. She woke Sweet Pea and I and we all got to the nursing home quickly. I have never seen her cry so much, not even when her Mom died. She had taken care of her Dad single-handedly, with Sweet Pea, Lionel and I by her side for the past seven years.

She talked to the Hospice nurse and nursing home supervisor about things and she was able to express her anger about the situation. They explained to us that quite often one of the residents who is dying will hold on to life as long as the family is there, in order to spare them the pain of watching them pass. That made perfect sense because Elinor's Dad was like that...unwilling that anyone should suffer or be put out by anything he did. He expressed his strong Christian faith to the very end. There's no doubt that he died peacefully and comfortably and he is rejoicing in Heaven with Jesus and is finally reunited with his loving wife, his dad and his sister.



Although we have experienced a great loss that we will never get over, neither Elinor, nor Lionel,nor Sweet Pea, nor I will have any regrets...we did everything we could do to make him happy and loved.

Sincerely,
Edward